My personal remake of Psalm 137:1-6.  It seems timely as we enter the Christmas season/extravagant spending season. :)

 Surrounded by a culture of excess, I wrap my arms around my middle and strive to think of what Heaven will really be like.

I sing my songs of praise, but at times the melody is drowned out by my pain.
My scoffers shake their heads sadly at my "ignorance" or openly ridicule my choice to live for that which I have not seen.  A culture of excess and intelligentsia has little room or need of Jesus. That's what they tell themselves as they use money as a balm over the emptiness they have grown used to ignoring, or fill it with yet another philosophical idea to debate among their elite groups.

 What keeps the song in my heart when the hurt surrounds me--both my own and every other face I encounter along the way?  The smiles are both a mask and real.

This is not my home! I do not belong here!  I will never fit in! Yet I get confused and try to be a chameleon and live in this Babylon without sticking out like a sore thumb. I forget for a moment and try to make myself comfortable in this foreign soil.

Give me a renewed sense of culture shock Lord.  Let me live in daily remembrance that you have called me apart and I walk by faith and not by sight.

Me? Pray for the President??

One of my favorite teachers has made a wise and powerful suggestion on her blog and I thought I would pass it on here for you to consider doing with me.   On the eve of our nation electing a new President, write out a prayer for him.  If you do it now, it won't be biased with your opinions or clouded by your thoughts of how the election went, but will be more pure in motive.  Can't think of what to pray?  Imagine if it were your husband or father being elected--what would you want people to be praying for him?  Then, over the coming weeks, months, and years, you will have something to pray for this man, regardless of whether he was your candidate of choice or not.  Can you imagine what a difference it would make if people spent as much time praying for their President as they did complaining about him?  Or, heaven help us, forwarding emails about how wretched he is?
 I go to sleep at peace tonight, knowing that no matter what happens tomorrow, my God is sovereign.  He is trustworthy.  Write out your prayers tonight--it's your opportunity. Go and vote tomorrow--it's your responsibility and privilege. Then, take some deep breaths and begin a journey of prayer for a new term of President for this great nation we are blessed to be a part of.

The Beauty of Adoption

 

February 2003: Playing with my babies at the Baby House in Russia--at this point we are waiting until our court date to finalize the adoption. We could only visit the kids each day--they couldn't come live with us in our hotel. We were sad about that, but we probably needed the rest--there wasn't much sleeping after they were officially ours.

 

In honor of today being Orphan Sunday, I thought I’d put a picture of my youngest two children during the time they were both legally still considered orphans. Although it’s been almost 10 years since then, it's still so clear in my mind how the act of stepping out in faith and in spite of our fears changed who we were. I trust God in a way I had never had before the adoption; my faith had not been tested so hard. I believe Him differently than I did before the adoption; He showed Himself worthy of putting my absolute belief in Him during that journey, even when it didn’t make sense. I love Him differently than I did before the adoption; once they put my children in my arms and I felt the love flow through me—the same, exact love I felt for my two biological children, I had a small idea of what God did for us when He called each one of us to be His very own—adopted heirs with His own biological Son, Jesus. Really, God? You love me like you love Jesus? How can that be? Ahhh, but I have an idea, because my love for my children is the same. The same! I’m so glad God allows us to participate with Him in His plans!

A Civilian’s Guide to the Military Wife

The other day in my blog, I mentioned that I was a patriotic kinda girl and I always have been.  I wasn’t excited, however, when my boyfriend our senior year of high-school told me he had been accepted to the Air Force Academy. I didn’t think that whole long distance relationship thing for four entire years would be much fun at all, and I was right in a lot of ways.  In other ways though, it prepared me for a life of often times having to love him from afar and live independently.  We have lived through our share of deployments, exercises where there is no access to him, and tdys (temporary duty assignments, or business trips), some long, some short. I have put down my own flooring, wallpaper, fixed toilets (they always overflow during deployments), dealt with hospital emergencies, traveled alone with kids via car or plane, held crying children that missed their daddy, cried myself to sleep, and got a dog—all during deployments.  Contact with deployed spouses went from driving to base to get one 15 minute video call (with horrible reception) during his tour to being able to talk daily via Facetime or Skype with our iPhones.  Amazing!

My man has served for 20 plus years now as an officer in the Air Force, so we have also had our share of relocations and all the other things being a military family entails. I have loved every minute of it, and when there looked to be a minute I might not love, I would go to the Chamber of Commerce of the new city and find something TO love. It has been a wonderful life, in spite of the hard times. My least favorite, even above deployments, has been living in limbo while the Air Force decided just what to do with us next.  If you’re a civilian and have no idea how to empathize with the limbo period a military family faces every few years here is a snapshot: Imagine having to sell your home whether the market was up or down. Imagine not knowing if you should enroll your kids in school or if you’ll be moved by then.  Imagine trying to eat all the food in your pantry because it might be any day that you get a few weeks’ notice to pack up. Imagine surfing the web at a myriad of different possible locations where you might be moving and trying to wrap your brain around how far that will be from family this time.  Imagine wondering if the new outdoor playset you bought for the kids at this duty station will put you over the amount of weight the military will pay to move. (if you go over, the cost per pound comes out of your pocket.) Imagine telling your friends you are moving in the next 6 months or so and watch the ensuing struggle that occurs while they try to protect their hearts and start to pull away even before you leave and really need their support.   And that doesn’t even scratch the surface of all the other “limbo” issues: should we sign the kids up for sports or will we leave before the season starts?  What will our new home/church/hairdresser/dentist/schools/friends be like? Will husband enjoy this job? Where will I fit in? How are the kids taking the news of moving this time, really? Will our house sell in time so that we can buy or will we have to rent or should we live on base? How long is the wait to live on base? Will our household goods come door to door (ha! Dream on! Happened only once to us in 20 years!)  Or will we be waiting days and weeks sleeping in a place on sleeping bags with just a few necessities? (Actually, that’s pretty fun!)

We are nearing the end of our time in the military and hopefully have used the last Sharpie to write “KITCHEN ITEMS” in large letters on a box so we can find it easily and eat sooner than later.  We have happily settled down in our little town in the Florida panhandle. It is close to the hometown my man and I grew up in and our family is within a couple of driving hours—a far cry from a four day drive across country.   We’ve lived in 10 houses in 20 years, had two children, adopted two more, and had a grand total of 16 pets live with us throughout those years (not counting the many fish that went on to Davy Jones’ locker!) My heart has hurt so badly watching my children hurt at times that the pain felt physical, yet I’m always surprised at how resiliently they have bounced back and adapted happily to their new home. We’ve missed our family and spent most vacations “going home”.  We have friends scattered across the world like the breadcrumbs from Hansel and Gretel…you try hard not to let proximity be the deciding factor on who you stay close friends with. 

But all in all…it has truly been a wonderful life and an honor to be a tiny part of serving this country in my own way.  To provide a safe place for a serviceman to come home to and make each house a home no matter how small/scary/fancy/decrepit/perfect is a learned art. To be the backbone of the family—the consistency for your children because daddy goes to serve—that’s an honor a military wife does not take lightly.  To have the strength to let your children experience pain because you know it makes them stronger, broadens their horizons, builds their character, and ultimately that they will be okay is tormenting.  To feel your stomach drop to your feet when you hear your serviceman say, “Honey, we need to talk. I talked with my boss today….” yet smile through the tears and say, “This will be good. It will all be good. California (or Louisiana or Germany or Idaho or North Dakota) will be a fun adventure! When do we go?” All of these things and more are truly an honor to a military spouse.  And we may be a little prideful because we’ve been through a lot and we came out the better for it, so forgive us if we come across less sympathetic than we should when you complain about your husband’s week long business trip.  We know better. It’s all relative.

 I will leave you with a few of my personal list of Do’s and Don’ts’ of Civilian/Military friendships:

 *Do open your heart to your military friend—even if she is in your life for a short time, you will both be better for having engaged and fully loved.

*Don’t discount the amount of time a spouse is gone: “Oh, it’s only 3 months? That won’t be bad—it will fly by I’m sure!” You may be trying to encourage your friend, but it is actually discouraging to be facing the daunting task of parenting/running a household alone and have your friend seemingly tell you to shrug it off.

*Do tell her you want to make dinner/keep the kids/hire a sitter and take her out, have her lawn mowed (or whatever you think will be the most help) and ask her which date works best for her.  One of my favorite birthdays ever involved two of my friends hiring a sitter for me as a surprise and taking me out to eat.  I cherish that memory over 10 years later.

*Don’t “jokingly” tell her after you find out her family is military that you can’t be friends with her because it hurts too bad when the military moves them. She knows a part of you means what you say. (Yes, I’ve had this said to me several times)

*Do introduce her to your friends and ESPECIALLY to your hairdresser (if you have a good one!) when she moves to your area.

 And don’t let proximity be the deciding factor in our friendship. J

Daily, Deliberately, and with Delight,
Lori

"Thirsting" for Sin?

I wrote this last summer as a Facebook note and thought I'd re-post it on my blog.

Had an interesting incident at last Saturday's soccer game and it got me thinking, which can be dangerous. :-) Here's the story: It's an Upward league, so those of you familiar know that at halftime, while the team gets some water and breaks in another room, the audience listens to either a testimony or watches a video--something that points to Christ. Well, this being the last game, the Upward coordinator asked the teams to stay in the gym and to wait to go to the bathroom and get water until the end of his presentation. He wanted to present the coaches with something and wanted the players present. Apparently Julia's team and coach missed that announcement, because 3 of the players, including Julia, went to get water. When she got close to us, Jimmy motioned for her to go back to her coach and sit down. She went, but not without talking back and pouting. When she sat by her coach, he asked her what was wrong. She broke out the tears then, and told him her daddy wouldn't let her get water. He asked why, and she shrugged her shoulders. So....the coach waited about a minute, and then told her to go get water anyway. She did.

It was all I could do to wait until the game was over to find out if she had lost her mind! We went in separate cars to the game because I had some errands to run, so Julia and I were alone in the car after the game, and our conversation went like this.

Me: So, I saw you were pretty upset when dad made you go sit down without water. Why do you think he wouldn't let you get a drink?
J: I have no idea Mom! (tears start back)
Me: Well, let's think about what you DO know about your daddy. Do you think he wants you to dehydrate?
J: no ma'am
Me: Do you think he was being hateful and wanted to watch you suffer even though he saw how hard you were playing and knew you were thirsty?
J: no ma'am
Me: Do you trust your daddy?
J: yes ma'am
Me: Then is it possible that maybe he had a reason for telling you to sit down that you just didn't understand at the time, but it was completely in your best interest?
J: I guess so.

So I explained that the coordinator had asked them to sit down and wait until the end of the presentation and pointed out that her daddy, who heard what he said and knew she would want to be there for it, gave her an instruction that she didn't understand. Because she didn't understand it and because it didn't fit in with "her" plan, she took the opportunity at the first chance she got to disobey. I can't imagine what was going on in that coach's mind to instruct my little girl to go against something her daddy told her not to do, regardless of how "unfair" it might have seemed.
She apologized, explaining that she hadn't heard the coordinator give those instructions and the rest of the conversation was one-sided. :-)

"Julia, learning to obey your mom and dad is your training ground for when you are out on your own. While you are learning to obey us, even when you don't get it, you are learning to obey God. There will be times in your life when you know God is instructing you to do (or not do) something, and you won't agree. It won't be in your plan. It won't be as much fun God's way. It will leave you longing for what you want. And the worst part will be when people you respect, people you really look up to, give you advice that go against the Word of God and/or what you hear Him saying to you. That's what your coach did today. You know what the Bible says in Ephesians 6:1--Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. It doesn't mention a coach, a sibling, a good friend, a teacher--it specifically says parents. God has entrusted us to be the ones you are primarily obedient to, so if a coach or anyone else tells you to go against what we say, that is wrong. And when you chose to go get water today, you chose sin over obedience. Where faith and trust come in is realizing that God has the Big Picture that you don't have. He knows what is in your best interest in the long run and just as you can trust your earthly daddy to lead you even when it doesn't make sense, you will need to learn to let your Heavenly Father lead you as well."

Anyway.... maybe you're thinking I'm making a mountain out of a molehill, but the truth is, sin is sin. We aren't told to measure our sin up against the world's and be relieved that we aren't THAT bad, we are told to hold our sin up to God's holiness--then it is all revealed as filthy rags. I came away from that game surprised, yet again, at the craftiness of the enemy we fight. He looks for our most vulnerable place, our longing, and then puts things (or people) into our path that make it seem okay. Or at least, not so bad. And when our focus is on ourselves and our longings and not Christ and His holiness, it is oh so easy to choose sin.

The good news, no, the GREAT news, is that we have a God that is not only in hot pursuit of us, but One that is longing to forgive and wipe the slate clean and leave the enemy chomping at the bit while we experience His grace. Over and over. Unmerited for sure. Because when we accept Christ and His grace, it's not like He uses an entire bottle of Clorox to get our filthy rags as clean as possible. No way. Those rags are replaced with snow white garments. Ahhhh, grace is so beautiful it brings tears to my eyes and swells my heart each time I am confronted with what it really means and what it really cost.

So, a frustrating experience, but a teachable moment came from it. Julia received a consequence, apologized very sincerely to her daddy, and like her Heavenly Father, he was a beautiful demonstration of forgiveness. Sadly, I think the lessons we learn the best are the ones we learn the hard way. I guess it's human nature, but it usually takes coming face to face with our sin against His holiness that takes our breath away and leads us to real change---repentance.

This picture was taken a few years ago at Julia's baptism--the day she symbolically said, "I choose repentance over rebellion." As many of us know, that is a daily decision--not a one time deal.  The choice to be a Christ-follower, however, is a one time deal. No matter how many mistakes we make, no many how many times we need our slates wiped clean, God's forgiveness is always there for us.  I wish the phrase "you can't out-sin God's ability to forgive" didn't sound cliche, because I am living proof that it is true! And so is Julia. ;-)

The Longest Week of My Life Is Almost Over...whew!

"She generally gave herself very good advice (though she very seldom followed it)." These words, penned by Lewis Carroll about Alice, made me laugh out loud tonight when I read them.  If ever I have lived a quote out in my own life, lately I have been living this one.
Last month I had my first (and please God, last) major surgery.  I plotted and planned and read about how to recover from surgery. I listened to sage advice from my surgeon, his nurse, and those who had "been there-done that" about the importance importance importance! of giving your body time to heal and not trying to do too much too soon! I vehemently nodded in agreement every time--I had every intention of taking plenty of time off to heal. In fact, I was secretly looking forward to being forced to slow down and allow myself to be pampered. 
That intense agreement with the sage lasted around eight days.  Around day eight, I started feeling a little antsy. The pain medicine I was taking prevented me from reading anything--I couldn't focus. I started getting frustrated-- I had things to DO! I would just do a little thing. Not a big thing. Like re-organize Anthony's room.  He HAS been asking me for so long...what else am I going to do? Sit on the sofa and watch HGTV until I turn into a zombie?
That one "little" thing turned into another "little" thing, and before I knew it, I was right back in my life full force.  Everything was fine. Kind of. Well, not really.  I was still taking strong pain medicine because that was the only way I could do all of the things I had been doing and survive my day.  When I would try to stop taking the medicine, I hurt so badly because I was doing waaaaay too much. It was a vicious cycle and I knew it.  I just wasn't quite sure what to do about it because I had obligations that I couldn't figure out what to do about and I figured I had missed my chance at really recuperating--trying to  go back and do it now would disappoint people. I don't like disappointing people.
Then I started dropping my balls. I had been juggling so many balls prior to the surgery, probably too many, but it was ok. I was healthy, exercising, sleeping well, staying in the Word, and in a good place. After surgery I could no longer exercise, I couldn't sleep, I couldn't even read my Bible--a recipe for ball dropping.  My ball dropping came in the form of anxiety and tears and constantly feeling overwhelmed.
Meanwhile, I have dear family and friends that love me and kept telling me I was doing too much, too soon.  One day at the beginning of this week, I actually heard them.  I took my last narcotic on Monday and went about the business on Tuesday (in between my tears of almost unbearable pain as my body adjusted to feeling pain full force) of clearing my calendar as completely as I could.  Each day until today has been utter agony--I really believe I had stagnated my recovery by doing so much and I treated myself like it was the first week post-surgery. It has been one of the longest weeks of my life, mainly because I disagree with the entire premise of pain.

This week has really been  pleasant once I got used to the idea of nothingness. It's hard work doing nothing, and I'm planning to keep it up for a while longer, and then slowly ease back into my life. And as for all of those "disappointed people" that I hated letting down? I have only been met with absolute support, love, and understanding. My friends have stepped up and taken things over for me, offered to help, graciously accepted my inability to do what I previously said I would do, and most importantly, listened with understanding and love.   In fact, I've been blown away by how much harder on myself than anyone else would ever think of being.  I think my mother may actually be right. lol

But if I was already juggling too many balls....does something (s) need to go? That's what I'm spending my "nothingness" doing; asking God to show me exactly what He wants me to be invested in.  I don't want to just do good things--I want to spend my time doing the God-things He has specifically laid out for me. Otherwise, I take the chance of stealing someone else's chance to do their God-thing and I don't leave time in my own life for rest. And that's the moral of today's little tale. :-)

P.S. I do not personally recommend going cold turkey off a pain medication--an incremental reduction plan is a much better and healthier way of going about it. :-) But I only have a degree from Google University, so please consult your physician before embarking on any plan involving pain and drugs! lol

A Different Take on Politics

I can’t even begin to tell you how much I despise an election year—I know, I know, it is a very unpatriotic thing to say, and believe me,  and I am a ‘tear up whenever I sing the National Anthem’ kinda girl—I love this country.  I typically keep my political opinions to myself, because they are, in fact, just my opinion. I wonder how many people really care about another person’s political beliefs. I’m not asking this rhetorically—I am curious if there are people out there who truly want to hear what other people think concerning politics.  Or is it a passive aggressive way of getting a chance to say your own opinions?
 

 My biggest pet peeve is cutting political jokes/cartoons, and slanted “facts” that are anything but and so extremist in point.  I cannot find a single benefit in these types of forwards and emails and Facebook posts.  Maybe I’m a stick-in-the-mud, but the chances of offending someone you care deeply about with opposite views of yours (even if they don’t as boisterously portray them) seems too high a price to pay at the expense of passing on what someone may or may not find funny. Even the jokes that are slanted in favor of my particular partisan party I find highly offensive. Why? Because they are not edifying. (Ephesians 4:29)  If I’m guarding my heart and my tongue to say things that build up others that I know, why would it be okay to let that slide when it comes to strangers that we don’t agree with?

And even if I didn’t feel all of the above thoughts,  I return to the big picture of why I was left here on this earth July 7, 1977 (the day I became a follower of Christ). It wasn’t to sway people in their political beliefs or (even as patriotic as I am being part of a family who has served on the front lines in a way) trying to help facilitate/promote America to become the greatest nation on earth. God left me here with a very specific purpose in writing in Matthew 28; “Therefore, go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” I feel overwhelmed at my efforts to do this one task He has given me in addition to being a wife/mom/daughter/friend/sister/mentor/leader/teacher that glorifies Him.  I have no energy left for political discourse personally, though I know it is a passion for some and I’m not saying they are wrong. What I am saying though, is two things; 1. if political fervor ever takes place in a Christian’s mind/energy/amount of time spent on it takes precedent over the Great Commission, whether consciously or unconsciously, then it is wrong—anything that comes ahead of Christ is an idol, and 2. I have never, ever heard of a person being won to Christ through political debates or cutting jokes/cartoons sent about a politician, whether the person on the receiving end supports said politician or not. So then, what would the motivation be? I can’t personally see how it could glorify God.

So, what if you find yourself in the position of not liking the person that holds the office of President?  My thoughts are, even if we don’t support the person in office, I feel there is a respect that the office itself is due and we should “give unto Caesar what is Caesar’s” (Luke 20:25). If that means I can’t find anything positive to say, then I remain silent and pray.  In a historical sense, I think back to our nation right after the Civil War was fought. In name we were one nation, the United States of America. But in reality, we weren’t.  There was so much hurt and bitterness and anger leftover as remnants of that bloody war and we were as divided as our nation has probably ever been.  It took years of slowly moving through generations for that pain to lessen, and there are still indelible effects from the mid 1800’s that will forever be etched as scars on our nation.  Shouldn’t we learn from history so that negative history doesn’t repeat itself? Not much good came from that chasm.  Once the war was decided, what kind of difference would it have made in the healing of our nation if the people of the South asked God to help them deal with the pain of loss and learn how to move forward in a way that was productive and healing?  What if the people of the North had come to the aid of their brothers in the South, not in a carpetbagger kind of way (of-course there were good carpetbaggers, we just rarely hear of them), but in a true sense of camaraderie and desire to help rebuild?  I know, I’m an idealist, but how different would our nation be today I wonder?  It would’ve required selflessness on both sides and a character of deep quality—a difficult but not unattainable goal.  Moving onto the politics of this day in history, how different would our nation be if Republicans, Democrats, and everything in-between spoke with respect of each other’s beliefs.  Social media has many upsides, but a huge downside is the seeming anonymity of “speaking your mind”.  Those are people reading your thoughts and scathing words and “jokes”—people that deserve respect. “Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversations be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.” Colossians 4:5-6 AND “Show proper respect to everyone, love the family of believers, fear God, honor the emperor.” 1 Peter2:17

I am such a Pollyanna though, and I know that. I would love to hear your thoughts. In an edifying way. ;-)

Two Ears, One Mouth...hmmm

Sometimes I will hear my man say to my youngest son, "You are NOT listening. God gave you two ears and one mouth for a reason!"  I'm guessing this pragmatic observation likely brings the boy irritation, but it always makes me giggle inside because of the "duh" factor. Our body parts DO imply that our Creator intended us to listen twice as much as we speak.   It's a good thing to remember sometimes that we weren't meant to do all the talking.  Especially for those of us that are blessed/cursed to be extraverts.  Man is it hard to filter that tongue and bring it under control! But that's a rabbit to be chased another day...

This morning as I was having my time alone with God, I found myself doing quite a bit of venting. Please tell me I'm not the only one who runs tattling to God about the real or perceived injustices in their life. Anyway, I had a little list. Not a big one. I'm not a grudge holder. But my little list was making me have a really stinky attitude.     As I prayed, I felt the Holy Spirit prompting me to try what my favorite devotional author, Sarah Young does. ( If you haven't read Jesus Calling, you might check it out--I've seen them at most bookstores, Christian bookstores, and even Walmart.)  Sarah wrote her prayers down for years, and one day she decided she was doing too much of the talking.  So she set out to write what she felt God was saying to her heart during her time of listening to Him in her prayer time. Uh, listening? That's so PASSIVE.  But is our purpose of praying to complain, give God our to-do list, or to simply make ourselves feel better? Are we approaching prayer as if it were a magic pill to take to help us with our troubles?  Of course, most of us don't consciously think those things, but is that the way we are approaching God? I wonder....how does it seem to Him?

Anyway, as I said, I decided to try what Sarah Young did and just take out a pen and notebook and sit and listen for what God spoke to my heart. How do I know it's God? It's really hard to explain, but for one, it ALWAYS matches up with His Word.  The other is that it is typically contrary to my human nature, whatever it is that He is pointing out to me. In other words, I would've chosen a different path.  An easier path.  A more crowded path.   There are more ways I've learned to recognize the Voice of God, but I think I might be chasing another rabbit. :-) So, I'll save more musings on this subject for another day. This is what I wrote down this morning when I was clever enough to stop and listen:

So Lori, you're feeling mistreated, disrespected, taken advantage of ?  Does any of that REALLY matter? Is your goal in life, the reason you think I left you on earth, to be in constant state of concern for yourself and your feelings? Or are you here to glorify me by loving others? Regardless of how you're treated?
Instead of getting indignent when you perceive someone is treating you in a way you don't feel you deserve, try praying for that person.  Pray that you can show my love to them regardless of how they are treating you. Try looking at them through the lens of my love.

"But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you."  Matthew 5:44

"Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.  Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace."  Ephesians 4:2-3

"Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you."  Ephesians 4:32

"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves." Philippians 2:3

D,D,&D,
Lori

25 1/2 THINGS ABOUT ME: Who I Am...on the lighter side.

1. I am crazy, head over heels in love with Jesus and His Daddy but I hope that isn't really random b/c it permeates every aspect of my life!
2. I married a boy I met in the 4th grade and I'm crazy, head over heels in love with him too--that was the second best decision I've ever made.
2.5 My man is in the Air Force--he just celebrated 20 years from when he pinned on in May of 2012! We have moved 11 times in that 20 years, and I have loved every single moment of the adventure. In 2010, we built our first home, the one we live in now.  As much as I have enjoyed the military life, my catch phrase during the build was, "Oh, we don't need to worry about re-sale value. This is the home our grandchildren will visit us in." :-)
3. I don’t like dark chocolate and I feel guilty about it. I love milk chocolate however, especially when it’s been violated by caramel.
4. I don’t like to cook and I feel guilty about that too. I do it anyway. I'm actually on a quest to enjoy it more by being more deliberate about it (sound familiar?) and finding ways to challenge myself with it. 
5. I am from the deep South and really missed the slower pace of life when the military had us in other places. I make great fried chicken, cornbread, and sweet tea, but I do NOT cook with bacon grease.
6. I have four kids but don’t like loud noises AT ALL. It isn’t working out well for me.
7. My kids are the sunshine of my life and I live daily with the fear of them one day leaving home. Please God, let them all live right next door!
8.  This year (2012-2013) will be my 11th year of homeschooling our kids and it is one of my favorite-ist things I’ve ever done! I wake up ALMOST every morning looking forward to it.
9. I love to laugh and I have a very dry sense of humor which takes some people time to understand about me, and it’s usually women. I’m patient.
10. I think all of our kids are funny and fun—actually they are all nutcases and my husband blames me. I’m not sure why. It’s undeserved.
11. I love to read (which homeschooling has hampered) and I love to write (also hampered by hs). I just LOVE words! I find the combination of them fascinating at times.
12.  I started piano lessons as an adult at 41 and it brings me peace and joy that I would never have dreamed I could feel. I'm in book 3. I really stink but no one in my family tells me because they know it's my happy place.
13. I have always loved having red hair, even as a little girl when I was teased mercilessly. I am somewhat offended by people who, as adults, get red hair from a bottle, never having endured the “character building” opportunities I did, but I'm getting over it. :-)  (i.e. “I’d rather be dead, than red on the head.” Puh leez)
14. I have been leading women’s Bible studies for many years and it is my passion—I long for others, especially women for some reason, to know how their lives can change for the better when they hand it over to God and walk daily in His Word and in His love.
15. I was a youth and music director at a church in Mississippi when I was in college and it was one of the highlights of my life.
16. I wear perfume almost every day—I love nice smells. I choose my perfume according to my mood. At this moment I own 8 bottles of perfume, 4 perfumed body powders, and I don't dare count the number of perfumed body sprays and lotions I own. It's ridiculous.
17. When I was in my early 30’s, a tornado formed right over our van when we were driving down the road and blew the windows out of it.  I had to go through counseling to stop the panic attacks from coming when bad weather approached after that. My older kids spent many nights sleeping on a mattress in the hallway with me in Shreveport b/c of MY tornado fears. My husband slept peacefully through each tornado scare in our comfortable bed. I'm working on forgiving him for not being afraid with me. :-) Now thunderstorms are delightful to me and I only wake up if a child stands by my bed and seeks comfort, so I guess I'm cured.
18. My mother taught me that when I’m feeling discontent, I should rearrange my furniture to make it feel new. I have done this since childhood and do it often for her when I visit her home since she can't do it as easily by herself now.
19. I’m married to a man who hates change and feels physical pain when he sees a room rearranged. I try to do it less frequently now.
20. If God had not blessed me with children (and I’m so glad He did), I think I would enjoy being a writer who professionally organizes people’s homes and lives on the side.
21. I am organized, but not in an anal retentive way. I do however, have a fetish about my picture frames being turned the way I want them. Like now, I’m feeling uncomfortable b/c someone tilted the picture frames on our piano too far to the righ…hang on, I’ll be right back.
22. I love my mom and dad so dearly and call my mom nearly every day. I feel at home in her home (although it is not the home of my childhood) as I do my own. She demonstrates unconditional love in an amazing way.
23. I have two older sisters who I am crazy about—I LOVE having sisters!! (My oldest sister does make fun of the picture frame thing though.) 
24. I love to travel, especially out of the country. I’ve been to Russia, Italy, France, Germany, Switzerland, Mexico, and Canada and have collected teapots and cups from a few of those countries.
25. I’m crazy about nature. The beach is my favorite place to meet with God, and now I live 15 minutes from the most beautiful beaches in the world.  I LOVE it when He starts playing with colors and shows me a gorgeous sunrise or sunset. When He lets snow fall from the sky I feel like He is raining down gentle kisses on my head.

 

 

Who Am I?

I know, I know...my blog title is verbose. But it perfectly states who I am--and I too, am verbose.  Exactly how does "Daily and Deliberately with Delight" state who I am?  Thank you for asking! :-)

Daily:  I am a God-follower.  I am not only a born again believer in Jesus Christ, though that certainly was the beginning of my journey.  That was just step one.  For years I stayed as a born again believer, and that was great.  It was just enough to get me to Heaven and be able to spend an eternity with Him.  A much more pleasant place than the alternative.  But that was not my motivation in becoming a child of God.  Not to escape hell. And not to earn a spot in heaven, though that is a lovely side benefit.  No, my motivation in following God is I am in awe of WHO HE IS.  I'm crazy about Him. Head over heels in love with my Savior! I realized one day that my walk with God didn't match up with my talk about God and that was not a pretty thing to face.  So I started on a journey of finding out what it means to follow Him daily.  In my opinion, that means my Monday-Saturdays should look remarkably similar to my Sundays. It means I make time each day with Him and look for opportunities to serve Him. And that gets me to...

Deliberately:  Loving God, serving Him, walking with Him on a daily basis does not happen naturally for me.  So I have found myself over the years enamored with words like "deliberate" and "intentional", because I long to live every aspect of my life in this way, and especially my spiritual journey.  I want to be deliberate in the time I spend with my kids, with my husband, with my friends. I want to be deliberate in the way I home school, in the activities I choose to participate in, in the way I serve others.  I want to be intentional about my schedules, my grocery shopping, my homemaking.  You get the picture.  I don't want to wake up near the end of my life, or even at the end of a week, and realize life "happened" to me and I let it slip by without deliberation on how I lived it.  I want to live every moment that I possibly can deliberately for God.  When I accepted Christ as my Savior, He left me on this earth for a reason-to glorify Him with my life.  The BSU I attended at Mississippi State said it the most succinctly I've ever heard: "To know Him and make Him known".

With delight: How does that fit in? I. love. to. laugh.  I laugh alot.  God has blessed me with four kids that laugh alot, and that I can laugh AT alot. ;-)  I think I have a God-given ability to find humor in things that might seem mundane to another observer.  So...if you were to observe me in my home, I might be chuckling about something I heard my kids say, something I (or they) did that was goofy, or just some way that I have inwardly tickled my own funny bone.  It's kind of hard to explain, but I don't think I could describe myself without somehow including laughter.

Before I go on, I hope I haven't given the impression that I'm doing all of this well.  If that's what you thought I was saying, forgive me for misrepresenting myself.  I am a woman on a journey to BECOME more Christ-like, but the road is narrow and actually pretty bumpy and often times I find myself on some crazy detour that I never meant to take.  That's where grace comes in--God forgives me, I forgive myself, and I start fresh day after day.  Some days I get it much better than others. Some days I want to throw the covers back over my head and yell "DO OVER" before 9 a.m.  Most of the time, I'm somewhere in-between.

Okay, so I've put off creating a blog for years because what in the world do I have to say that someone else hasn't already said? I mean, there is nothing new under the sun, right? After years of debating with myself over this same question, I've come to the conclusion that I LONG to write, I have a NEED to write,  and I'm tired of trying to make my Facebook status updates into a blog.  I'm not trying to pretend like I have all the answers, but I do have lots of questions.  Authenticity is incredibly important to me--if you read my blog you will read about the good, the bad, and the ugly.  My hope and prayer is that what you will find on here is a woman who is on a journey toward the God I absolutely adore and seek desperately to serve.  I am also pretty regular about falling short and seeking and receiving His forgiveness.  And then, with God's mercy that is fresh every morning (Lam. 3:22-23), starting over again with a clean slate.

D,D, &D,
Lori